Category Archives: Blog


Charles Manson is Getting Married

A Bachelor Party Mn or Bachelor Party Wi for our illustrious 80 year young Charles Manson who’s getting married to a former Stripper Mn or Stripper Wi?

Well hot diggity-dogski … 80 year young serial killing, mass murdering Charles Manson Dude is indeed getting married to this lovely-lovely 26 year old former Stripper Mn or Stripper Wi Afton Elaine Burton from the midwest! Score another one for that DeathRowDate .com …. damn that website is on flippin-flamin fire! Does she actually believe he’s innocent? I know there are literally billions of people on the planet who believe far-far stranger things of course, like ancient, mythological, fairytale, Yahweh-Monster-Gods floating around above the clouds in the sky… somehow looking out for them! So I suppose Charles could be innocent? I mean seriously, who am I to judge right?

Will there be a bachelor party Mn? Or perhaps a bachelor party Wi? With strippers Mn or strippers Wi? Maybe even with that truly amazing world renowned Bachelor Party Show? Where would they hold the doggone-dandy event… in the prison dining hall? I’m curious if her parents approve of the engagement? Or if they too feel him to be innocent? I wonder how many family ‘n friends will be attending the wedding anyway? Perhaps it’ll be a destination wedding, maybe in Hawaii or Jamaica? What would be the ideal wedding gift for them… his ‘n her bath towels perhaps? A toaster or convection oven? Do they allow kitchen appliances in prison? Or even a towel-rack for that matter? I’d like to see that-there engagement ring! Perhaps our young Charles Manson Dude custom-made it out of some quality prison soap or stationary? Oh well, I wish I could attend that ceremony just to congratulate young Charles for landing that fine, fine fish of 26, see him in a tux, see her dress & of course the wedding cake!

The prison guards must be having a hey day with this. No doubt some good bastardly belly laughs among them to be sure! Will several of them be attending the ceremonial proceedings? What about the dandy,downhome delightful prison Dean Dude? Will he be there as an emotional support for lil Charlesqueak? Other than the bachelor party Mn or bachelor party Wi, I’m really, really curious to know if there will be Strippers Mn or even a few handy-dandy Strippers Wi for the pre-wedding festivities? Try to imagine that convicted felon prison sausage fest of sorts! Could the famous “TeamTurboCoaches” of handle ‘n keep control of such a limp, listless, lifeless, lame, languid, lackluster lot of lackadaisical lunatics I wonder? I suspect not… however, make no mistake peoples I’ve been proven wrong before.

€{ `• _, `•} Creative Courtesy of The World-Renowned AAA~Classic Dancer~Dudes Creative ClickLickCommander ‘n Chief~Imagineer … Professor Big Smooth! Indeed “The BadAss Bastardly Bachelor Party Behemoth & Bachelorette Party Non-LackLuster Leviathan” … with it’s illustrious World HeadTurboQuarters in the lovely-lovely St. Louis Park / Minneapolis Mn since 1984

SouthEast: 612-781-3330
SouthWest: 952-922-9599
NorthEast: 651-633-1361
NorthWest: 763-566-8919

View three of our many, many wayward websites at:

Bachelor Party Ideas Minneapolis, MN

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  • Stripper Twister
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The Borneo Boner

In Borneo, an island in Malay Archipelago islands of southeast Asia, this PowerPackedPlump ‘n Protruding PotTurboBellied, Polyamorous Proboscis is no-doubt Borneo’s undisputed, philandering, womanizing, non-lackadaisical, non-lackluster lothario-like sex machine! He comes accompanied of course with a non-stop, perpetual 24-hour erection & an average of 20 badass-babesicles in handy-dandy harem! Sweet Jesus 4him! I suppose with that many dingle-dangle craving concubines in your lair… one would pretty much need to ultimately sustain a 24-hour hard, baloney-pony, beef-stick-like log~o~love!

However, the sad part of this story is the much, much, much bigger picture that I’ve argued for many, many years now. Which is that PALM OIL trees/plantations across this southeast Asia region are completely wiping-out their habitat (as well as 1000s of other precious species) AND is a bullshit, artery-clogging, heart-stopping, cancer-causing nasty oil in the first place that you do not want inside your organism under any circumstances whatsoever!! And naturally, it’s in a lot of canned ‘n processed, packaged, disease-producing pseudo-foods that most of you people live-on. It’s also found tucked-away in your chocolates, shampoos & many, many, many other consumer items! Read your labels people… basically anything with Palm Kernel Oil in it you want to avoid like the Bubonic Plague. At least if you give two-squirts about our planet, these innocent, beautiful beasts, 1000s of other species & your own health!!!

~With L.O.V.E., your extremely concerned AAA~Classic Commander ‘n Chief-Imagineer ….. Professor John~A~Long.

Turbo Tips

Turbo Tips

Always be certain to read ALL of my extremely Helpful, Loving, Informative, Educational ‘n FREE BusinessTrainingTexts bare-minimum 6-9x & perhaps many of them DAILY upon greeting the dawn! You see PeeWee, my “TitillatingTantalizing TurboTutelage ‘n Terse TechnologicallyAdvanced, TwinkleToes, TwoStepTeachings” indeed all come accompanied with that turboteeny-weany-tiny, puny, piddly, petite, peasized, pinprick, paltry, lil-added-extra, beneficient virtue if you will…..